And she's off.....

Be still my heart-- the day that felt so far away when she got her mission call finally came. My heart sang and it wept- I watched part of it walk away from me towards a security gate and airplane line.  I've been leaning on the faithful examples of so many missionary mamas who have already done this, many of them several times over, and it has strengthened me to know that if they can, I can.  I can make that kind of sacrifice, I can love my Savior enough to let go....Literally the greatest faith leap of my life-  and while I ache-- I am so so grateful-- because it's right, it's time, she's ready and mostly- I have absolute trust in the Lord because I KNOW HE TAKES CARE OF HIS MISSIONARIES.  She is His- well, she's always been his, on loan to me- but today it felt like I passed the baton back to Him- just for 18 months-- and I trust Him.  I know it will challenge her, humble her, change her, grow her testimony and let her spread her wings.  She will come back to us older, wise, more mature in her understanding of the gospel and the workings of the Holy Ghost.  She'll learn to lead out, and how to follow the spirit.  She will have companions who will be a blessing and some who will stretch her and teach her about compassion and patience.  She's going to return so independent- those amazing blue eyes that will have seen a continent and a people I may never see-- and she will love them dearly.  She will speak Spanish like it's her own language and bear testimony of God's love and the redemptive power,  offered to us by His begotten Son, Jesus Christ.   She will learn to lean on heaven like never before and she'll truly discover the amazing gift that her membership in the church is- and how sharing the truth of the restored gospel, by the power of the spirit will change hearts and draw others to Christ.  This is His work.  This is His hastening and it is an measurable privilege to have a child who wants to please Him, to serve Him, to be His instrument. What  a blessing to send a missionary off-- a beautiful heartbreak, a sweet opportunity -- and so it begins....

Ready to take on Ecuador-- or at least Provo for the next 6 weeks

I wanted to take a picture of her missionary shoes... so shiny- I know they won't come back looking like this

It was actually really hard for us to all smile for this picture-- no one really felt like smiling....

Sadie and Lainey (the bookends)

Sadie and Graham 

Sadie and Avery (the twins)

Sadie and Miles

Sadie and Emma-This one is a tough separation especially not only have they been a duo their entire life, share a room, do everything together- but Emma wants to  go on a mission too- and because they are just 12 months apart in age, they'll  overlap in missionary service-- so this goodbye is a lot longer than 18 months...and I think it was just hard to let go of things that won't ever be the same-- like late night talks, and everything else that growing up with your sister as your very best friend means.

same hug, two angles....

Sadie and Dad

Sadie and Mama

It felt like she was breathing me in and I didn't want to let go....I asked her if it would embarrass her if I came running up to the doors for arriving passengers when she gets home... because I don't think I'll be able to help it. 

But then it was time-- and Sadie is a sunshine always, so she made light of it somehow-- I think by saying "hurrah for Israel" 

and tried to gather herself- and so did we--

and then she was off...

Hermana Miller-

 there goes our heart all wrapped up in a whole lot of faith until April 2021